Thursday, February 14, 2013

World of Tanks: Clans

World of Tanks is a game wherein, you battle in multi-player combat, in tanks!  The tanks represented therein start at the very beginnings of armored warfare, up to, currently, the early 1950s. I'm sure will continue to pump-out "tanks" until we reach the modern era of this dynamic form of warfare.

What a war tank may look like

What boy ever disliked a tank?  It's a "tractor with a gun" (as someone told me once that had not much interest in them).  I've always played tank games and war games.  One of my fav is old Panzer General by SSI.  This was a hexagonal, table-top style game.  It incorporated tanks, tank destroyers, planes, troops, even ships! It was the first PC game I can remember wherein I got to dabble with a Tiger II a Jagdtiger and other prototype tanks.

Panzer General by SSI released circa 1994

World of Tanks went even further -- as far as the list of eclectic tanks go -- and has tossed in tanks that only ever made it to paper schematics in some cases.  This was way cool, and I dove into it early, early beta.  However, the game is limited.  A crew of so many is reduced to you, moving about with keys on the keyboard and pointing a moused-driven reticle at enemies and firing.  In a primal sense, it is silly, but don't get me wrong, I love it!

Silly, how?  Well, mostly men are sitting behind computers, with a keyboard and mouse, shooting avatars of others.  But this is the way of all video gaming, right?  I have lamented the lack of true warfare, of true, "combined arms" in WoT.  I'm sure, one day, will give us what we want however.

But whereas Rome: Total War and Panzer General presented single-player, holistic combat, with maps of nations or sections of a country or even the entire known world, World of Tanks provides, basically, "rooms," arenas to combat in.  Back in the days of the 1st MMOGs, "zoning" was a pain. In Everquest I (and 2), you "zoned" into the next piece of the world.  World of Tanks regresses this back to the stone age.  You load into a "room," you conduct combat, you leave, check your stats, talk to friends, load the next battle.  It is called an "MMOG," but honestly, WoT has only pieces of the concept.

In part, this is amalgamated into a "world" via the Global recently added North America to the mix.  To participate in this "piece" of the game you must enter into a World of Tanks "clan" in order to conduct Clan Wars on said Global Map ... again, pieces. has stated they plan on bringing the Global Map to the average player:
"How can you get non-clanned players to play on the global map?  Historical battles will be similar to the global map, but without obligations.  The clan global map takes a lot of dedication.  The historical global map will not."

Disclaimer: I'm not complaining ... yet.  I love the game, as this blog shows.  But, complaint is coming, grfi! (get ready for it!).

Stats and clans: with all online gaming, comparison, humans, name it, competition ensues.  (Fu Darwin!) And boy, World of Tanks has it.  All good and fine.  It's par for the course (no pun, you know ... golf and stats and all).  Getting used to the stats, working to improve your stats, seeing that, for thousands of battles you didn't think about it, and were needing to improve to enjoy the game (and yes, winning is more enjoyable than losing) and then watching your stats improve, understanding how to play ... all of this is both a factor of the game and _can_ be beneficial.  Now, it can be frustrating, but still, beneficial.  Lemme splain: at 1st it sucked, but as I grew, larned (did "larned"on purpose) and got better, the stats became part of the game that I went from not liking, to liking.

More on stats: when I have a bad day, some bad games, die too soon, etc., I need to just walk away, but I think about what I did, how I could've improved it ... hell, I even kept a "dying log" at one point, detailing each death in a battle, why, what to do to not do it again, etc.  The stats helped me to see: too much sniping, need more engaging, to much rushing, need more hulldown. etc.

Ncnyhbgrfi! (Note: complaint not yet here, but get read for it!)
Disclaimer: I am a very average player.  I used to be even worse.  I am not at all bragging about my stats or elitism ... as if!

tl;dr: Stats were a pain, but then a gain (yes, meant to rhyme).  Stats are something that I accept as part of the game, and can be useful to enjoy this game.

btw ^this guy had worse stats than...

...^this guy

And here's the complaint: clans.
Clans in World of Tanks is/are something that I 1st had to understand, participate in, be a part of, get familiar with, experience ... but never has it been good.  And this directly means the attitudes I encounter from the "elite" or "top" or wtfever clans that are "on the grid" or "holding 'big' territory on the global map" ... you know, making gold I guess and having those purplish colors in their names in xvm.

Lemme stress this part: the one negative attribute to World of Tanks that persists is the clanning, the clans.  That's a fkdvhtfgvmsho (fatkiddown very honest to fucking god very much so humble opinion).

What a real clan looks like

[Disclaimer: I ran a very, very successful Quake clan back in the 90's; we won a lot of tournaments, back when it meant nothing and you got absolutely nothing for it -- still.... and it was stressful, and for this reason, I've still not ran-at-clans in WoT; i.e., I've worked hard to keep WoT a casual experience]

I never wanted to do clans again, but in World of Tanks I have, in part.  I joined two, then made the third.

The two I was in had the problems all clans do: un-involvment and uptightedness.  The 1st one, literally, no one ever got online -- I rarely saw them.  The 2nd had mega requirements and really angry people in it.  I made my current clan with the charter: "no obligations, no pressure and no assholes."  So far, we play a lot together, we are a core of about a dozen, and we have fun.  We have all learned from each other.  I've learned far more from them than they have from me.  And, I took to heart wg's admonishment, that you can make a clan: "to just play with friends" (what clans who do moderately to well at holding land on the Global Map refer to as "a scrub clan"; see below)

[***"Clans are ongoing military unions of players created for co-operative accomplishment of military missions, geopolitical games, or just for fun."]

Clan wars: we talk about it, but we've not yet done it.  Why?  We have felt good about just hanging out so far.  Some have left to join clans that compete hard in clan wars.  That's good.  They are encouraging us to participate with them, but then, I am put in the path of "big" or "elite" clans, as today, and I am reminded of why I may never do this.

What online video game "clans" _may_ look like

Not to mention: many of us are older, with kids (even grandkids).  We have lives, wives and obligations.  (To those of you with kids -- I said "kids" plural here -- with 30k games, for the love of god and your children, take a gd break from the game and raise your kids!...).  Scheduling, being required to even show up only a few times to play the game simply goes beyond what we are willing to do for our entertainment.  tl;dr: we are true men! (even you fkd? fucking woman! yes, me too!)

Anyhow, back to the bitching:

Map: Fisherman's Bay.  Spawned in the south: Me and another member of my clan are in a platoon.  We go town, east.  East is doing ok.  I notice west is not doing good.  (We actually were ahead in kill counts, with the most killed on the side I went: east).  I decide to go west to help, in my Lion.  I tell clanmate in Type 59 to come.  I see west might need his help however.  I tell him to go back.  I get halfway between east and west -- with only an 8.8 TD left on west now, and both east and west begin folding.

Rage time: this is when a guy in an "elite clan" (who has just died) on the east sees me heading through flag cap to the west and decides my sole purpose was to save the lone 8.8 TD fighting for his life and, of course, to throw the game.  This is when he is raging.  This is when he has great omniscience to know all that has transpired.  After all, he's fully watched the replay to see right?  Of course not:

Him: "Lowe! wtf!?  Fucking noob!  Going back to help a dead TD! Now we lose! Idiot! Noob!" <-- something to that effect.  It continued.  It was nasty.

I say little in response, but he was grossly wrong.  I knew he was wrong.  I knew he didn't know why I went back.  I knew he had been embroiled in the east, most likely unaware.  [I mean, after all, he's in an "elite clan" that holds territory (i.e., "gold") on the Global Map.  Surely, any "baddy" or "pubby" is lesser than.]  It was ok by me.  I blew it off and fought.  However, he continues to berate me.  I put up a heck of a defense vs their last 4, but die: defeat.

A simple break-down of the battle

After the battle, I pmed him:

fkd: 1st off, when I went back to flag, east was fine and west was failing. I'll be glad to send you a replay. By the time I was too far to turn back to help west, both had failed. I'll give you an opportunity to apologize now, but I am a beta player, and it is up to you to keep this pro or otherwise.

Him: i'm a good player i have situational awareness [yet, he seems unaware that west was failing first]

Him: the jt was fine [when I started back, there was not just a TD, and I never went back for a "jt"]

Him: you died to a bunch of low hp tanks [untrue; the TD in my rear was 100%, so was the KV-5 and Lion; I managed to get them all down however -- he couldn't be more wrong here]

Him: i'm not appologising [sic]

fkd: No problem. I will be adding you to my ignore list and reporting to your clan leadership.

fkd: I have a long standing in wot community

fkd: You have >5k games [I mean, he needed me to know how "noob" I was; I have 3x his battles]

fkd: you are most likely young [act it, you are it]

fkd: Work on the attitude and realize this game is about opinions as much as anything [as his clan's charter states, see below]

fkd: and, I disagree with your assessment of that battle [srsly, very erred]

fkd: Otherwise, good day

Now, mind you, I thought beforehand not to engage this guy.  99.9% of the time, I just add to ignore, but my day of tanks had been bad, and I was frustrated, I hadn't had my cappuccino, my cat's sick, my DVR failed to record my fav Oxygen network show, and I was unhappy with the Grammys!

btw, Jack White entirely destroyed! at the Grammys....

So, having messed-up and engaged an "elite clan guy" yet again (this marks one of several times I've done this, and it's never worked out, and get ready for it to not workout again) I take it further:

rubrix2929: "fkd. why do you blog this shit?"
fkd: "cuz man, I'm hurting...."
rubrix2929: "dude, they're just gonna laugh at you."
fkd: "idc! I don't need anything but this ashtray!"

[Disclaimer again: I get complaints about people in my "scrub" clan; I address them; I care what people think about me and my clan; and hey, I mess up too; I rage; but if someone confronts me on it, I'll apologize and make it right -- all we have are bros! wtf do I keep using semicolons so much?!?!?]

What you're about to see next can be called: a colossal waste of fuck up....

I send a message to the clan leader:

For what it's worth: I care about my clan's rep and would address any complaints like this one:

[elite clan guy] is now on my ignore list.  If that's good enough for you it is for me as well.  His attitude publicly is very poor to say the least.  After some insults in game I pmed him to rectify and he refused.

tl;dr: I just wanted you to know how he is representing your clan.  It is the first encounter I think I've had with any ["name of elite clan" member].


My gut was saying to me, "fkd, dude, why you do this? it will _not_ go well ... IT NEVER HAS!!!" to wit, i retort: "shutup brain!"

And here is "elite clan" leader's reply to me:

faggot: Don't care. You run an irrelevant scrub clan, your opinion is therefor invalid.

What this "elite clan" leader _may_ look like

Disclaimer: I'm naming this clan leader, "faggot" as defined here by Louis CK.

Note: I had no clue that his clan wasn't "scrub," no more than I did not know mine was.  I'm making the assumption -- and am running with it -- that it is something big, his clan, bcs, like, that's what he's posited in contrast to mine.  Yes, let's just go with this....

And there we have it.  Yes, I do reddit.  Yes, I use the Internet.  Yes, it is a brutal, horrible, human-less place wherein, weak-minded people hide behind anonymity and mind fuck others.  But wouldn't it be nice if in the game we love of the thing we love (a gd tank!) we didn't have this?

Wouldn't it be great if there was just, just, just this one place, with tanks, with way cool tanks of myth and schematics-only from the great nations of tankdom, that we all just got a bong? along?

And here's the kicker, it is _always_ this way.  I have _yet_ to encounter these "elite" clans -- who seem to live to play this game -- where it has gone well....

Lemme stress this point: it ... always ... goes ... bad .. with ... these ... people!  FOR THE WHY!?!?!?

not calling anyone a nazi here, just love that seen from the movie....

Keyboard mouse pointy clacky clicky video gaming tanks?  Ok, I like it, nay, love it!  Sure, no infantry, no troops, pillboxes, ships, but it's fun!  Stats comparing and putting downing and deriding and trolling?  Sure, ok, np.  I can improve.

But elitism, un-professionalism and not giving a rats ass about how you are presented to the "great unwashed" that play the game (and I am a proud member of "the great unwashed" of World of Tanks)....  I cannot get used to.

I cannot get used to condescension and honestly, making the game unfun for everyone else.

And so, I visit this "elite clan's" page, and find that the guy who calls me "irrelevant" and "scrub" [and uses the less common form "therefor" over "therefore"] wrote his clan's vaunted charter, policy, recruitment stuff -- it is quite a work.  In part, it says [And I need to paraphrase heavily here but still capture the meaning cuz this is good stuff and it's googleable, and I don't want to N&S!!! ...oh, and get ready for some pure, unadulterated, straight-from-the-heart-of-a-dying-sun, GOLD!!!!!!!!]:

Here it is, from this elite clan's own charter, written by the very faggot who called my clan "irrelevant" and "scrub":

"Keep a good, mature face on the clan.  Perfection is tough to come by.  Be critical, but do it right.  We believe in team." [The clan recruit was neither mature nor did he do "criticism" right at all]

And oh, it gets good here:

"More than anything [yes! it has this emphasis at the beginning of this part] you are required to respect: clan leadership, members and the non-members." [Srsly!??!  They wrote this, no no, the "leader" who condescends me wrote this?!?  I'm sorry, his name is officially "faggot" now]

Omfg, it gets even betterer:

"[Elite clan] will not stir up stuff [he stirred stuff up].  Be mature and don't! put down other clans!" [But he did put down another clan.  I guess this needs to be edited to: "it's ok to put down 'scub clans'; He was horrifically, lady gagaly immature, and he put me down, but wait, he didn't put down my clan!  Nope, the clan leader, of all people, put down my clan -- it folds condescending time here: the clan leader who wrote this very statement/stuff/crap put down my clan! meh hed asplode!...]

[I did my damnedest to not name and shame there; I wish to got -- yes, I said "got" for "god" -- I could have quoted that directly, but it is a public page they put out there; it is huge really, in volume of words]

what god may look like

Juxtapose: I'm with two of my clan members the other day. We battle and the new guy says to the other team in allsay, "you guys sucked."  We get back to the garage and I go, "was that necessary? To tell them they sucked _after_ we beat them?"  He goes, "I guess not." <-- exactly!  It pissed me off, uncalled for, grow-the-fuck-up.

But now back to the elite, non-"scrub" clan ran by leader faggot:

And so, in this, we see, even they, in theory (commas!) know what is right and what is wrong.  After all, they put it into their gd charter!  No wait, the very assmunch who assmunched put this shit into his fucking charter!  This is like Congress not following the Constitution!... wait, bad example....

It is an issue of theory and practice maybe: Theory and practice: in theory, there is no difference between theory and practice, but in practice, there just might be....

In any event: dear elite clan leader, AKA, faggot: with all due respect (and none is really due anymore): fuck you! You are full of fucking shit, your writing is shit, your meaning is shit and this is bullshit.  I.e., don't write, say or promote stuff you don't mean.  ("I said it. I meant it. I'm here to represent it.")  Especially, don't spend massive amounts of time writing books (...I'm doing that right now aren't I?).  Don't write books of shit and ask your fucking recruits to read it.  What is this?  Little Rascals club house?   It is, that's all this clan shit is!  It's as if this is some sort of video game and I, too, take it waaay too srsly or sumfin....

You don't know what you mean quite obviously.

And here's the kicker (how many 'kickers' is this now?): once I took the issue to pm with the "recruit" of this clan, he actually got more civil.  The leader, the clan leader, the guy above, the guy, the leadership, the fucking toolasswipe ... he took it to a whole new, hypocritical, immature, contradictory-to-shit-he-writes-and-makes-recruits-read fucking level!

"But fkd! You made a clan, sure, a 'scrub clan,' but still, a clan.  How can you be so down on clans in WoT?"

I'm only burning my half

Let this be the last time I try or try to involve myself with those that are "on the grid" as a non-scrub clan.

tl;dr: clans: they need a fixin' in World of Tanks.....

A scrub clan
"fkd, aren't you just butthurt?"

Yes.  I suppose I am, but put that aside.  Srsly?  This needs to be?  Like, _everytime_ these guys gotta be this way -- always?  Forever?



They are faggots.... (And please, spare me and go look up Louis CK on this)

Conclusion: if you are in a clan and are cool, then you're cool.  If you're in a "top clan" and are cool, then you are cool.  If you don't act like a total tool-asswipe faggot, and have purple stats and get 150 gold per show-up to a clan war match, and you are cool, then you're cool.  None of this is directed at you.

However, let me be clear here: I've only met one of you that are like this, and I knew you before you got into that big clan, and we are still cool.

Otherwise, my experiences with the "elite clans" is denoted here.

Srsly, World of Tanks is huge now, you are in a "top clan" (so says you) and you don't give 2 shits about anything but winning!? (/queue Charlie Sheen).  A reputation, a personae or just doing the right thing are meaningless (love this younger generation).  Grow a heart, save a puppy and be a pro bro.  It's just a game.  No need to ruin it for the rest of us....

No comments:

Post a Comment